This week, I have this drawing I did of Dom and Gabriel from my Do You Really Care? comics wearing swimsuits. I wanted to practice this new skeleton bit I was working on, at the hips. I think it turned out all right. I also wanted to feel out some stylistic things. With the illustrations I’ve been working on, I go right into high detail and greater realism, because it’s fun to push for all the different things I can include and think through. But that’s not what every panel in my comics will look like; not only does consistently having that level of realism not serve the kind of comics I want to make, but having one level of…stylistic intensity(?) isn’t what I want. So I wanted to try something more simplified, to remind myself what I want to be drawing as I gear up for this graphic novel. It was also very nice to have these familiar faces and their vibe with me as I went through this week.
On another note, the store I work at has started playing Christmas music, starting the day after Halloween. I HATE it. It honestly seems hard to work in retail without hating Christmas, from my perspective. Everything about your job gets worse, with no increase in compensation, and you’re constantly bombarded with it from every angle. I’m so angry that we all know why they’re doing it and why it’s bs but no one seems to care and even treats it as a moral failing to dislike the holiday. It’s a perfectly fine holiday, but it’s just, like, a day! I don’t want to be in it for two or three months. Nothing is as good as Christmas propaganda makes it out to be, especially Christmas. If you actually love it that much, shouldn’t you also be this angry?
And I especially dislike most of the Christmas music. Like, aside from how annoyingly omnipresent it is, they’re just mostly bad songs, at least the stuff that gets played everywhere. Several of them aren’t even about Christmas, they just take place in the winter. They’re old and out of date and tacky and boring, and we only play and praise them because we remember hearing them as a child. Nostalgia is poison. So I’ve been thinking about why I dislike the songs I dislike, and what I actually want from Christmas culture.
First off, I hate Last Christmas and All I Want For Christmas Is You. I hate the entire subgenre of “romantic Christmas songs.” Like, they’re not really Christmas songs, they’re just regular love songs set during the holiday or using the themes as reference points; they’re cash grabs. Songs about how the love you have in your life, including a romantic relationship, being all you need are generally fine and come from a sweet place. Asking to begin a long term romantic and sexual relationship with another human being, whether or not they’re interested in you, isn’t Christmas. It’s not selfless or asking for a little or being good. Romance is, by definition, a selfish affair, as it should be. It’s about desire and attraction, it’s asking for something from someone else. So I generally dislike songs that frame starting a relationship as a small gift request or as gifting your heart to another, because it’s neither of those things. Especially since they contrast their humble request for love by saying they don’t want or even like the presents they get. Santa is a metaphor. You’re an adult, you know those presents came from your friends and family, you ingrate. If you strike out with your crush, I still expect you to appreciate and enjoy what I got you. Like, despite saying they’re not being selfish by “just asking for love,” they’re still being really selfish. Selfishness doesn’t have to be bad, but they still bring it to that negative space in their cheery, toxic positive voices, and I hate it.
More than that, though, I hate where it comes from. Over the decades, as wealth inequality has increased and we all get increasingly broke, we are expected to give even more than ever to each other at Christmas (for corporate profit) while also recognizing that we have less and less to give, and so we frame asking for presents and all the materialistic aspects of the holiday as morally bad. Be like the Whos in Whoville, right? But it’s not a moral failing to want nice things. Plus, giving presents to other people feels nice. We’re physical creatures in a physical world; we’re allowed and are supposed to like material things. We have so much to go around in this country, and so few of us get any of it. So I hate hearing songs that reflect this downward spiral in our lives, where we do a cutesy bow to pretend like being poor and only being able to offer affection isn’t dystopian. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying the presents and the stuff and the food; those are what makes Christmas nice. It’s everyone’s birthday, and we’re allowed to have desires. There’s an obvious mismatch with the, “Buy all the useless random crap we make,” attitude of capitalism and the actual nice part of presents and gift-giving. But don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater, and don’t do it while pretending like asking someone out is somehow a Christmas thing. Save it for February.
There are plenty of older songs that I don’t like just because I’ve heard them so many times and music was worse back then. There are new Christmas songs they could be playing on store radios, you know? I don’t need to hear seven tracks from Gwen Stefani’s Christmas cash grab album every day. But what I really want to get into are the songs I do like, because I’ve found a clear contrast. I like songs like The Man With the Bag and Santa Baby. Songs where adults play into the pageantry of the holiday and the stuff we do. Songs where we take the fictional world of Christmas seriously and have fun with it. Songs where we take open joy in getting presents as adults. Once again, we’re all expected to ignore how dystopian it is that we frame adulthood around suffering and loss, that liking toys and fun is for kids only. Christmas is for everyone, and we should all get to be our honest, true selves and have fun and play games without “being a kid again.”
I also like songs like All the Gifts I Need and Silver Bells. Songs about the real, everyday special things that make the holiday and the world better. Like I said before, it’s really sweet to hear people say they feel so blessed just to have their people in their lives, to look around and realize how happy and grateful you are for what you have. When it’s done well, it’s a great warm and fuzzy; even when it’s too saccharine and feels disingenuous, it’s still not offensive. I also like the joy in seeing your everyday world in a new light. A reminder that despite all the negatives you focus on, people are good and nice. I talked recently about the contrast between the romanticized magic of art and the actual special experience of it, and that’s the vibe I want from Christmas songs. I don’t need Santa to be literally real to have magic in the world.
Plus, for Silver Bells in particular, I like it as a city person. So much of Christmas is wrapped up in Christian nationalist hogwash, so we hear a lot about how small towns are the “real America” with the “real Christmas.” You know, where you’re far away from education and cultural diversity? No, I want to hear about how, despite capitalism’s best efforts, we didn’t lose our soul in these streets. Even when we grew up, became adults, and moved into the big cities, we still have that spark of joy and love and generosity that make Christmas a good holiday. We didn’t lose anything in our adulthoods, so we don’t have to go back to childhood in small towns for Christmas. I like songs that move forward and take joy in where we currently are. I don’t like songs that take us back to an idyllic, fictional past where things were better, when singular authority figures controlled our lives for our benefit, and which encourage our longing to return to that time. Cough cough.
Weekly Art Blog 11/2-11/9/2024
Life in the Gutters 